By JAVIER MANJARRESU.S. Senator Marco Rubio, who many consider to be the future of the Republican Party, has been implicated in a pay-for-play scheme with the Miami Metro Zoo, over an allegation that he stands to benefit financial from a bill that he is supposed to introduce.
The bill which calls for an initial funding of $5 million for the zoo’s ‘Save the Chimp’ program, which the zoo launched this past February, is slated to be introduced by Rubio sometime in the month of April.
According to several individuals who are cooperating with Federal officials, by introducing the bill, Rubio will be receiving a ‘kick back’ from the zoo in the form of a pack of chimpanzees that Rubio himself hand picked while touring the Amazon jungle in Colombia late last year.
Rubio’s kick back also includes an unlimited supply of bananas to feed the animals, as well as several yearly all expense paid vacations to Colombia for himself and the chimpanzees. According to those same individuals, Rubio has already named one of the primates Pepe.
A Federal Inquiry is currently underway, in an attempt to find out the extent of Rubio’s possible involvement in the scheme, as well as to see how far along the readers of this dopey story got before they realized that they were victims of an April Fool’s joke. Suckers.Share and “Like” the post below.